And for dessert madam? One large slice of memory please

When I am in a restaurant and the dessert menu happens to find itself in my mits I follow the same process everytime, EVERYTIME.  I open said menu, do a quick scan, locate the word chocolate, read the description of the chocolate offering and then disregard everything else.  To some this may seem boring or habitual, to those who know me it is regarded as normal, without question.  I am a chocoholic so any fruity options to me are just blah.

My husband is the opposite as are some of my friends and would favour a sweet, tangy crumble or pie over the dense, rich, smooth indulgence of chocolate.  For me chocolate is pure, decadent luxury and as such is the perfect way to finish a delicious culinary experience.  I would feel it a waste of a fine dining experience to come away having not sampled the pastry chefs chocolate creation, an insult almost to there time and effort toiling in the heat of the kitchen.

My husband and I enjoy entertaining in our home meaning our guests reciprocate and cook for us in their home.  Such invitations are always accepted with enthusiasm as we are blessed with a network of friends all of whom are very skilled in the culinary department.  I do however always feel a pang of anxiety depending on the house to be visited regards dessert.  You see some people like myself (I always have at least two desserts to choose from in an effort to suit all tastes) will plan their menu according to the tastes of their guests, others however suit their own tastes.  It is in these house I know I will be offered up poached fruit or some such confection which is perfectly delicious but give us a birra chocola pulease!!!

Two weeks ago myself and the hubby attended Sunday lunch in the home of the parents of our sister in law.  My husband is not backward in coming forward and harrasses the poor woman every time he sees her for an invitation to Sunday lunch for some of her famous mushy peas.  So it would seem that he wore her down and she finally told our sis in law to invite us.  It was a delicious mammy's dinner.  Full of flavour, every mouthful a little bit of comfort on a fork and each plate groaned under the weight of enough food to feed a small family.  Then dessert was brought to the table, two deep filled apple tarts.  I smiled politely and enthused that they looked delicious whilst inwardly whinging at the thought of NO FRICKIN CHOCOLATE!

My manners are impeccable so I accepted my plate with much thanks and politely proceeded to spoon some into my mouth.  Bang.  I had tasted this deliciously perfect apple tart before, fresh from my mams oven and many, many years ago.  However, following years of dismissal of such caca milis I had completely eradicated all traces of it from my memory right up until this moment.  It brought the warmest of smiles to my face to remember happily tucking into large wedges of apple tart, still warm and smothered in cream on many Sunday afternoons, my mam standing over the kitchen table ensuring everyone happy and contented before she sat down to hers, wiping her hands on her orange and yellow ditsy floral print apron.  The day of this magical epiphany, Mothers day, how apt as she so vividly flooded my consciosness and a love of apple tart long forgotten was reborn.

For that reason I have, as best I can, recreated a version as closely matched to my mam's as I can remember.  I hope to enjoy this many times again, and that many others will too.

Apple Tart

For the pastry:
175g/6oz Butter (softened)
50g/2oz Caster Sugar
2 Eggs
250g/9oz Plain Flour (sieved)
For the filling:
700g/1&1/2lbs Bramley Cooking Apples
150g/5oz Caster Sugar

1.  For the pastry cream the butter and sugar until pale and creamy using a a hand held electric whisk with dough hooks.
2.  Add one egg and continue to beat.
3.  In a seperate bowl beat the second egg and add half to the butter/sugar mixture, reserve the rest for later, continue to beat.
4.  Sieve in the flour and beat until the mixture forms a ball of dough.
5.  On a clean work surface knead the dough for a couple of minutes.
6.  Divide the dough in to two pieces, flatten each into a round, wrap in cling film and chill in the fridge for at least 1 hour.
7.  Preheat the oven to 180°C/350°F/Gas Mark 4.
8.  Lightly grease a baking dish/tin with butter.
9.  Peel and slice the apples and toss in the caster sugar.
10. Once chilled place the dough onto a floured work surface and roll each round to a depth of 3mm.
11. Line the prepared dish/tin with one sheet of pastry dough and trim any excess from the edges.  Brush some of the reserved beaten egg around the rim.
12. Fill the pastry case with the apples, layering them evenly throughout.
13. Place the second sheet of pastry over the top of the apples, press down on the rim and trim any excess.  Brush all over with the remaining beaten egg.
14. Place in the preheated oven and bake for 45-50mins or until golden brown on top.
15. Allow to cool slightly and enjoy with fresh cream, custard or ice cream.

Let it snow, let it snow.....alright enough already!

My childhood memories of snow are few and far between an quite frankly a little hazy. I could most probably count on both hands the amount of truly snowy days that I have experienced in my whole lifetime, that is up until now. We would very occasionally be blessed with a day off school because the pipes had frozen and when I did build a snowman it was generally of the anorexic variety because if you had an inch of snow be God there must have been an all out blizzard.

Having lived only in Ireland I have only once before experienced weather similar to that of the last two weeks. My very first trip to New York was in January of 2003 and the temperatures there were a crisp -15C. Now this was my first trip stateside and New York is very obviously used to these Baltic temperatures, life functions unhindered with safe roads and pavements, the weather was seen through very romantic eyes.

Their were nine of us in total on that trip, seven of us travelled together and two more joined us a day later. We all came prepared with warm coats, hats, scarves and gloves, and sensible shoes. All apart from my sister in law who walked the snowy streets of Manhattan in 6 inch stilettos. We all grinned like Cheshire cats as we huddled in a group to have our photo taken in front of the Empire State Building, walked around the city in sub zero temperatures without complaint, marvelled at the sight of Central Park with its thick blanket of snow, giggled at the the amateur skaters on the ice in Rockefeller Centre and braved the temperatures at night in order to dress in our finery for dinner and cocktails.

On our first night we phoned home to our late arrivals to advise them of the extreme temperatures and advise them to pack for the North Pole. They took our warnings as nothing more than the Irish abroad exaggerating as we have a tendency to do and each packed a heavy 'Irish winter' coat and no accessories. They snickered when we met for pre dinner drinks the evening of their arrival and layered ourselves up before departure to the restaurant. I would say approximately 2 minutes later when we hit the streets in hunt of taxis it was the rest of us snickering as they could barely speak with the cold and looked up and down the block frantically for a street vendor from whom to purchase hats, scarves and gloves. Very stylish 'I Love NY' hats et al were soon secure on their person and remained so for the rest of the holiday without any remarks of our exaggerating prior to their arrival.

And so it was that for the remainder of the holiday we layered ourselves up like the Michelin man, tramped around the streets of New York and stopped when necessary for an alcoholic beverage to warm our cockles without a second thought and more importantly without a grumble. Fast forward 7 years and to Ireland and non holiday mindsets and it would seem that our bodies have somehow forgotten how to cope with this weather phenomenon we are faced with. I personally have not left the house except when necessary for the past two weeks, engagements have been cancelled, daily walks have been abandoned and the cupboards are almost bare.

I think some of it is rooted in our biological make up. We live in what is probably best described as a tepid climate, never too hot, never too cold just somewhere nicely balanced in the middle. For this reason our natural thermostat is thrown into a tizzy on the rare occasions that we experience a heatwave or a cold snap. Our natural response to this cold weather is therefore to slow down, eat plenty of hearty, warming comfort food and to cocoon ourselves in layers of clothing and blankets and basically hibernate. In a heatwave our bodies slow down (any excuse it would seem) we strip back the layers (hence our poor eyes are assaulted by the sight of lily white beer bellies wobbling unabashedly in public), graze on our food in an attempt to shed some unnecessary insulation and wait for the rain to return.

The common denominator of these two extremes in weather is the love that Irish people have for a good old moan. By God if moaning was an Olympic sport we'd take home gold, silver and bronze every time. At the moment everybody is moaning about being trapped inside for fear of breaking a limb stepping foot outside the door onto the icy surfaces that the government haven't bothered to grit. In hot conditions we complain that there isn't a breath to be had and that we can't function properly in the heat. And when there are no extremes but just bog standard Irish rain we complain that were sick of the cold and the wet and would love to live in a Mediterranean climate.

So there you have it, there is absolutely no pleasing us and while we may be thwarted by the weather at present it suits us just grand cos we can have a good old moan and a right go at the government for their ineptness in dealing with the situation at hand and plunging us into a state of natural emergency.

Why is it that the entire country has ground to a very frosty halt? It is fair to say that we rarely have weather so cold for longer than 2 or 3 days and snow rarely sticks to the ground for long and for this reason national and local contingency plans while effective initially have well and truly been stretched to there limits and beyond. Our belief that we had had our 3 days worth until next Christmas I'm sure delayed the ordering of fresh supplies until eventually someone in a council office somewhere probably said, 'actually lads I don't think this is actually gonna blow over in a couple of days so maybe (just maybe) we should order in a bit more salt'. Said supplies are supposedly en route and it's a good thing they are as we are said to have another 10 days of snow and frost stretched out ahead of us, this is the third consecutive day that I have heard news reports state 10 days as the duration!

To ride this out I have opted for hibernation. Apart form necessary tasks and travel I have taken to lounging on my sofa with a warm blanket, plenty of chocolate and the remote control. I am quite enjoying the excuse to divulge myself in so much guilt free inactivity. When I settle down each evening basking in the soft glow of lamplight, the flickering of deliciously fragrant candles and look out at the moon illuminating the snowy blanket, I wrap my hands around a steaming mug of hot chocolate and I must admit that I am completely and utterly intoxicated by the beauty of this fluffy, marshmallow like weather phenomenon. It has rendered my brain all but useless and for this reason I have not ventured into the kitchen to indulge in my favourite pass time of baking, but if you would like something delicious to warm you on these wintry nights I suggest one of my favourite indulgences - a Bailey's hot chocolate. The creamy liqueur transforms a humble hot chocolate into a silky, internal hot water bottle that will melt away any post Christmas blues. So enjoy (obviously in moderation, you don't want to wake up face down in the snow now do you?) and stay safe when out and about on the ice.

Bailey's Hot Chocolate

• 1 Mug of steaming hot chocolate
• 1oz Bailey's or similar cream liqueur
• Whipped Cream (optional)
• Flaked Chocolate (optional)

1. Simply make a mug of your chosen hot chocolate according to instructions.
2. Add 1 oz of Bailey's and stir to combine.
3. Add 2 tablespoons of whipped cream to the top if desired and crumble some flaked chocolate over the cream.